There can be a self-fulfilling, almost prophetic nature to our life. Consider this all-too-true riddle or Catch-22:
We learn from our past what to predict for the future. Then we live in the future we expected.
Too often, we predict the worst outcomes, not the best. We expect to do poorly in a presentation—and our prediction comes true. We plan to lose weight or go to the gym, but deep down we don’t really believe we can or will. And, lo and behold, we underachieve. We are setting ourselves up for failure. Can we make this “pre-lived future” work for us? Can we undermine its destructive influence?
Yes, there are several ways to turn self-fulfilling prophecies to our advantage. The best place to start is by predicting an attainable, yet reasonably challenging, future. If your expectation is unrealistic, failure is built in. It is far better to under-promise and over-deliver than to over-promise, under-deliver, and fail.
Next, predict successful outcomes. Imagine winning. See yourself achieving that realistic goal. Turn this riddle so it works to your advantage by expecting positive outcomes.
If you have been unsuccessful in the past, try to reframe this attempt as a first time—even if it isn’t. Previous attempts can plague us and set us up for failure. Mindfully let go of past disappointments, or consider them irrelevant. At the very least, don’t let them dictate what happens next. Release preconceived notions or unhelpful ideas that hold you back.
At the root of this cycle is our tendency to predict the future and fuss about the past. Instead, we should strive to be in the present moment. Being caught in a loop between what has been and what might be only compromises the now.
So why not live in the present moment, reframe it, and believe it can be very good indeed?